Posted by: docdenbow | July 7, 2013

Only Mad Dogs……..


As a whole we Brits moan and moan about the weather. We are subject to almost constant drizzle throughout the twelve months. Complaints are uttered that the winters are not like they used to be, with the ability to build snowmen, go tobogganing or terrorize neighbours with snowballs severely curtailed by the lack of the white stuff.

“It’s not like it was was when I was a kid!” say the oldies.

Then swiftly we see Spring that is either late or early, not unlike a bus, that confuses the flora and fauna. The BBC will likely as not pop onto our TV screens and tell us that this the wettest/driest/coldest/warmest spring since records began.Cue middle aged balding scientist hitting News24 to tell us that it’s the fault of Global Warming and that the damage is done and we’re basically up the creek without a paddle. The boat may be useful though if the sea levels rise by the 25 feet (or is it metres?) that’s predicted. Oh yes. Tewksbury will be under water. (Again)

The Spring then changes into Summer. The date is exact, this year it was 31st March and we then put away our Winter woolies and dig out the shorts, shades, stupid hats and flip flops. Ambitious cricketer dust down their bats and pads and wash the whites in readiness for the smack of leather on willow. They congregate in a windswept field shivering against the drizzle whilst they spend hours in nets in what is usually a vain attempt to hone their collective techniques.

Yet, as May turns to June the sun pops it’s head out from behind the clouds cover (which helps a cricketers balls swing) and we get the first glimpse of nice weather, which is swiftly followed by the same balding scientist as before telling BBC New24 that this is due to our friend Global Warming. The flood waters in Tewksbury finally recede like the scientists hair and we all then get ready for The Sun to prints its traditional headline,

“Phew what a scorcher!”

Usually we will then see the rest of the popular press moving real news to deep within its pages whilst devoting maximum space to tanned lithe lovelies in varying states of (un)dress. Glastonbury comes and goes where crap bands such as the Arctic Monkeys are hailed as genius on the grounds that they once had a half decent single.Then the dreaded yawnfest that is Wimbledon hits us and hits us hard with blanket coverage of people we’ve never heard of playing a game the entire population of the UK suddenly become armchair experts on, as we shout and cheer on the latest hope, this time a miserable Scot called Murray.

This weekend (Sunday 7/7/2013) we are ending the weekend and my time off work with glorious weather. Just want to say of couple of things about that. I like the sun and the hot weather

BUT

Fat blokes wearings vests is not a good look.
Fat women showing midriffs is not a good look.
Men and women alike who do not look after their feet wearing flip flops is offensive.

Finally dog owners, it’s my views that it’s cruel to take Rover for walkies in this weather is cruel unless there is a handly stream or suchlike close at hand.

Ciao For Now

Denbow

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