Posted by: docdenbow | February 25, 2013

I’m A Citizen Of Nowhere – The Boyo With A Yam Yam Twang

I managed to get it off my chest in a recent post the way the thick portion of the Welsh population get on my nerves, I think that it’s time to redress the balance. As I have mentioned in some of my earlier chatterings I moved away from Wolverhampton when I was just 21 some 33 years ago. I was consumed by ambition became a very young manager of a branch of a famous record shop in Swansea. Truth be told I wasn’t ready for the job, couldn’t handle the people as I had insufficient maturity and discipline to be in charge. The support I got from the two regional managers was pathetic, both of whom seemed to have their own agendas Then after a largely successful 12 months where I, despite my people management shortcomings, managed to boost sales by a considerable margin I was unceremoniously shown the door on the pathetic reason of “breaching help and safety.” (still don’t know what I did) They call me in from my holiday in to meet them in the Wolverhampton store whereupon I was summarily dismissed. Yes Mr Area Manager you were, and I suppose still are, a ruthless sort but hey that was 30 odd years ago so I would shake your hand now……..just before I spat in your face. No encouragement, no help to a young lad, just a P-45. Looking back at that young lad, the treatment he received was pretty cruel.

Anyway that left me in Swansea with no job and a flat that I couldn’t afford the rent for anymore. Did I return to the land of The Yam-Yam tail between the legs? No I bloody well didn’t because for all the sh*tty times I’d had in the first years here in Wales I’ve got to say I’ll take Swansea over Wolverhampton any day. I get asked from time to time whether I miss Wolverhampton. The sad truth is I don’t. I know times change and all that, but the Wolverhampton where I grew up doesn’t exist anymore. So here I will remain, forever, as I see no earthly reason (apart from the odd moronic wanker who gets on my nerves from time to time) to move from Abertawe. (That’s Swansea in Welsh)

So why wouldn’t I move back the 150 miles to Wolverhampton? Well for a start there’s Gower and the beaches, the scenery, the woods (more like a mini forest) at the bottom of my road. I took the picture on the top of this blog and that bay is all of 7 miles from my front door (Caswell Bay incidentally) and it’s just one of many beautiful places close to home.

Perhaps more importantly to me is the fact that the pace of life is better, the whole atmosphere is so different to Wolverhampton. When I do go back to visit my Mom, or chat to bloggers in supermarket car parks, I find that there is something there that makes me feel uneasy.I feel there an undercurrent of lawlessness. It may just be in my mind, and a feeling that I don’t fit there anymore. A Boyo with a Yam Yam twang? Is that what I’ve become in the past thirty years?

A citizen of nowhere? Yet when I relax and take it all in, that Black Cloud stops following me. I manage to get the proverbial monkey off my back. I have come to the realization that the boy who left the Black Country is not a boy anymore, he’s not even the same person all grown up. The man who grew from the boy knows that the environment in which he lives is more conducive to his own happiness and it has changed him. To me now, Wolverhampton is just a name on the map where the boy that I was lived, loved, laughed and had good times and bad times, friends and enemies. I remember those times fondly.

That was then.

Swansea is home. It’s where I am and it’s who I am. It’s my wife, my kids, my dog, my job. It’s my life and it is my history, both good and bad. The boy grew in Wolverhampton, but the man is in Swansea.

This is now.

Ciao For Now




  1. A lovely piece. I’m considering writing a few more autobiographical pieces in light on my previous blog post about death in my family. A lovely read here mate. (Be careful who you chat to in car parks, there is an odd fellow in Bilston who’ll meet up with anyone!)

  2. […] is a reply to the post here by my blog buddy, […]

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