Posted by: docdenbow | December 18, 2012

Crypto Research Advanced Zoological International Expeditionary Society

In many ways I am a complete and utter idiot. As evidenced by some of my earlier posts I watch programmes on the TV that are absolutely crap – sometimes more than once. Yes indeed, I am rather partial to not only wasting my life watching the equivalent of effluence on that glowing panel, I am also quite content to watch the repeats that come whizzing around usually within a few days. I think my level of stupidity is on a par with the intelligence of Dr Stephen Hawking and just about level with the Finding Bigfoot crew. It’s made me come to the inevitable conclusion that I really should form the UK chapter of the BFRO and go off in search of my very own Squatch. However, as the number of sighting of 8 foot tall hairy primates wandering about over here is pretty thin on the ground I think that I should go off on a quest to prove the existence of something else.

Hmmm, now what could I search for and research? I have been drawing up a shortlist which I’ll share with you.

1) Camelot – Where was it, how big was it and so on.
2) Stonehenge – Alien occupancy and UFO stuff.
3) The search for the missing Milk Floats of the UK.
4) The Lost City Of Atlantis…(it is in fact located in an underground cavern underneath Tipton library – DY4 8QL)
5) Proving the existence of the United Kingdom’s own Area 51 (actually located on a Industrial Park in Milton Keynes)

However, although these are challenging and worthwhile enterprises I have gathered together a small, but fanatical bunch of social outcasts and deviants and nut jobs to look at something that is the biggest mystery in the UK in modern times. I am of course alluding to a quasi mythical beasts that inhabits our isles. There are many who believe these beasts to be nothing more than the stuff of legend as sightings are rare. Those who talk of these creatures are usually old and the veracity of their sightings is usually dismissed as the meanderings of an ancient mind.

I shall of course be investigating Wolves in the wilds of Scotland, the Beast Of Exmoor, the Loch Ness Monster of Loch Ness, the Chupacabra of Clyne Woods and of course the lion of Colchester. The investigations will will carried out in a professional, diligent and thorough manner leaving no stone unturned in the pursuit of irrefutable proof of the existence of these hitherto unrecognized beasties.

I have been seeking sponsorship and television coverage for this endeavour but both Discovery and National Geographic have both told me in less than polite terms to “bugger off.” The Daily Mail is, however interested and there are other newspapers that are showing more than a little interest. Indeed I am still awaiting a reply from Penguin books as I have offered them an exclusive. Failing that Eden (satellite channel) will come through and cough up some cash largely due to some very “interesting” footage I have of their senior management out on a team bonding exercise.

As this enterprise is still very much in its’ infancy I have little more to report at present, but keep looking back for regular updates.

Ciao For Now,



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