Posted by: docdenbow | December 13, 2011

Mike Hammer, Shark Trager, Adrian Mole & Me

When I started blogging earlier this year I had little idea or notion as to what what subject I would bang on about and bore anybody who actually read it. As the year is rolling towards its inevitable conclusion, I decided to read through some of what I’d written here and was actually startled by some of the postings – all me own work as well.

This one was initially rather puzzling to me –

Maybe Go & See A Doctor

You see 4 weeks after I wrote that I ended up a twitching thrashing wreck bruising my bum and generally having a seizure don’tcha know.I just wonder if deep in my subconscious I knew that the “Big Bad” was on its way, and was affecting my mood accordingly? I’ve had epilepsy all of my life and only thought about it when I was feeling sorry for myself or looking for excuses about things that went wrong. Resentful I was. But looking at three obsessive miserable depressing posts relating to epilepsy I reckon something had to give. As as I’ve pointed out in detail elsewhere on this blog, give it certainly did.

As ever I have let things get away from me a little bit here. What I really want to write about is what my ambitions are for this little ole blog and what my ambitions are for my writing.When I started tapping the keys to write stuff here I just wanted to write stuff that was both funny and thought provoking. The thing is, I can do funny but I’m essentially I’m about as deep as a paddling pool so I don’t think I can provoke much thought apart from the thought that my readers may get that I’m a twat. That dear reader is your thought, and who am I to impinge upon your right to think of me as a twat.

The other thing I want here is readers, especially comments from real people and I’d love to have a few subscribers. The comments if they were honest would help me hone any writing skills that I may possess and subscribers would be good for my ego. Like everyone who writes I have influences in both style and content. There are many writers whose work I admire, but I am only truly envious of those who can make a living out of writing. Who are my literary heroes I think I can here you ask? (Self delusion again) Well like my musical tastes they are pretty far and wide. I am partial to many of the classic novels, yeah right rock and roll!. Read a quite a few I’ll have you know, but these days I read stuff that truly speaks to my soul. My favourite novelist right now is that giant of American literature Mickey Spillane. Who needs Steinbeck, Salinger or even Norman Mailer when you have Spillane. He had characters to look up to. Women to lust after. Bad guys to beat up and shoot. Mike Hammer had morality and loved with the same intensity in which he hated. Trouble is he was portrayed on the telly by Stacy Keach. Now I have nothing against Stacy, I think he was great as Mike Hammer, but he bought a lot of baggage to the role, not least appearances in “Princess Daisy” and “Mistral’s Daughter.” These were two sugar sweet mini series based on the “novels” of that brilliant writer Judith Krantz. I think we’ll leave that one there.

To be serious I really don’t have a hero as a writer but I do have a favourite novel. It’s called “Boy Wonder” and was written by James Robert Baker.This is the blurb on the back –

“Shark Trager wanted everything Hollywood had to offer – the fame, the fortune, the thrills, even the perfect California blonde. And one way or another he got – and lost – it all …
Born in the back of a Chrysler at the Flying Wing Drive-In during a showing of the B-movie film noir Gun Crazy, Shark Trager was arguably the quintessential Hollywood wunderkind producer of the last quarter of the twentieth century. Which means that he was probably the definitive narcissistic genius-as-monster of the entire movie industry, if not of the entire civilization, as well. Trager’s controversial career (Sex Kill à Go-Go, Mondo Jet Set, etc), his obsession for heiress Kathy Petro, his outrageous (some might even say despicable) behaviour in both his public and private life, his immense popularity and equally immense vilification, his sudden filmably spectacular death, all epitomized the culture he did so much to enrich. Here is a man who accepted James Dean into his soul as a Christian must accept Jesus into his heart. Here is a man unscrupulous in his pursuit of Art; unprincipled in his pursuit of Love; untempered in his pursuit of Life. Here is Shark Trager as he is remembered by those who loved and loathed him most.”

It’s absolutely brilliant. A true tour-de-force. I cannot speak highly enough of this masterpiece. You can pick it up for pennies on Amazon and I really suggest that you do. I have read it several times and it gets better every time I read it. I even bought a second copy just in case I lost the first. But beware it’s fairly graphic in places so you’ll need to be broadminded!

I’d love to have the kind of skill to write a piece of fiction like “Boy Wonder,” but it’s really not my style to write like that. I have written about 25% of a novel a few years ago, but anyone who read it seemed to give me a polite smile and a stifled yawn. Some of it’s on this blog, have a look – it’s just a very rough draft and please leave a comment even if you think it’s a pile of pooh.

There are five chapters on here, try this one –

Hospitals Don’t Have Bars

I really ought to try to finish it, I have nearly all of it locked away in my head, but I don’t have the heart to retype it all as I have no soft copy of all 45,000 words that I’ve written. Come guys give me some feedback on the 5 chapters and I may have a go.

I’m currently writing something new, I’m not sure where it’s taking me yet, but I’m sure around the 20,000 word mark I’ll know. It’s a detective story mutating at the moment into a love story of sorts, nothing too soppy, I hope, but for me the love story angle will certainly be a challenge. I just hope I can bring it off.

I really hope I’m not Adrian Mole or Brian Griffin and not just an oaf with delusions of talent or skill, call it what you will………

Ciao For Now !



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